Friday, January 28, 2005
seems to be a few nights ago when i staggred back to madison and went straight to the toilet bowl to projectile vomit after sampling the best of airline cuisine. These days i keep waking up and not believing that i'm actually back in madison already, even if the snow outside keeps piling up into white lumps of shit.
two weeks already and not much has changed. its a struggle so far and it a struggle it will stay. its hard to wake up when the alarm clock rings and u know you have a day full of shit ahead. its hard to even go downstairs for breakfast anymore because its plain ol' grub and 3 semesters of eating the best of Bob the cook's efforts and finding out whether the mystery meat in the jumbalaya is beef or chicken or a mixture or both has lost its novelty value. its really siannish to go to class everday and deal with snotty freshmen thinking i can't speak english because i wear shitty clothes ("oh you're from China?") ; premeds who sit in the front of the class, think the world about themsleves and generally block out my usual train of thought from that infantile chatter (oh, you've applied for cornell? coool! hey, i've heard this class is soooooo2 (hanyu pingyin can be used to imitate the midwestern accent, thats fo sho !) easy man, the prof gives easy As man...u know what i mean) ; freaking bimbo korean/jappy/taiwanese/other-rich-asian-country girls talking about which white guy gave them head (or the other way round *pfft*) the weekend before and comparing dick sizes and who-treated-who-at-which-expensive-restaurant-and-did-what-later.
i could go on and on about this sort of shit, as u will probably have realized that
a) i'm an antisocial rat bastard
b) i hate people
it was quite a revelation in Russki Lit class when the prof was droning on and on about the text that the reason why i stuck out like a sore thumb over here was not a surprise at all, because thats always been the case even when i was home. Chekhov was right. everyone has some sort of a case that prevents himself from touching base in reality. for my case, i'm stuck in a cast iron box. 9 inch thick lined with lead to be exact.
of course, this makes me a huge wussy living inside my own world. this wussy doesnt like to appear vulnerable, nor to be inclined to be social to others. this wussy sees the world from journals and books and theoretical shit. this wussy is a huge ass
so stay away.
two weeks already and not much has changed. its a struggle so far and it a struggle it will stay. its hard to wake up when the alarm clock rings and u know you have a day full of shit ahead. its hard to even go downstairs for breakfast anymore because its plain ol' grub and 3 semesters of eating the best of Bob the cook's efforts and finding out whether the mystery meat in the jumbalaya is beef or chicken or a mixture or both has lost its novelty value. its really siannish to go to class everday and deal with snotty freshmen thinking i can't speak english because i wear shitty clothes ("oh you're from China?") ; premeds who sit in the front of the class, think the world about themsleves and generally block out my usual train of thought from that infantile chatter (oh, you've applied for cornell? coool! hey, i've heard this class is soooooo2 (hanyu pingyin can be used to imitate the midwestern accent, thats fo sho !) easy man, the prof gives easy As man...u know what i mean) ; freaking bimbo korean/jappy/taiwanese/other-rich-asian-country girls talking about which white guy gave them head (or the other way round *pfft*) the weekend before and comparing dick sizes and who-treated-who-at-which-expensive-restaurant-and-did-what-later.
i could go on and on about this sort of shit, as u will probably have realized that
a) i'm an antisocial rat bastard
b) i hate people
it was quite a revelation in Russki Lit class when the prof was droning on and on about the text that the reason why i stuck out like a sore thumb over here was not a surprise at all, because thats always been the case even when i was home. Chekhov was right. everyone has some sort of a case that prevents himself from touching base in reality. for my case, i'm stuck in a cast iron box. 9 inch thick lined with lead to be exact.
of course, this makes me a huge wussy living inside my own world. this wussy doesnt like to appear vulnerable, nor to be inclined to be social to others. this wussy sees the world from journals and books and theoretical shit. this wussy is a huge ass
so stay away.
